...🐌 Lesson from a snail

Please read till the end

I won’t be sharing these thoughts on my social media platforms:

As you hopefully know, I’m screening a film this Friday evening called Human Animals.

(I just checked and 84 tickets out of 200 have sold)

Tickets and donations here!

And when I decided to go ahead and organise the film screening, I felt really strongly that we needed “something” afterwards to give a bit of a buffer. Because it’s not a film that you want to go directly out into Melbourne CBD after watching.

So I made sure to add extra time for what I’m calling a “debrief”.

And it’s been on my heart a lot as we get closer to Friday. Because I’m not exactly sure what it’s going to look like and how people will respond. It’s definitely a lot more vulnerable than organising a Q&A that stays more within the “head realm”. The “heart realm” is new territory for a lot of people. Especially in a setting like a cinema auditorium.

And then yesterday I had something happen that confirms that I’ve made the right decision…but also highlighted just how we can’t predict how humans will emotionally respond and how delicately I need to tread on Friday.

The context is that I went along to a neuro-divergent friendly performance that’s part of the Melbourne Fringe Festival with a client of mine. The producer had literally thought of EVERYTHING to prepare the audience for what might feel triggering. It couldn’t have been more gentle if they tried. For example, they showed us what type of lighting effects would happen and what type of noises we could expect and so on.

But even with all that preparation there was a person in the audience who absolutely fell apart emotionally when a gentle giant snail slid onto the stage. Huge sobs and wails. And shaking so much that what I assume was a support person who was specifically worded up to be available for anyone who was struggling, had to come over and embrace the distraught person until they could breathe calmly again.

And it made me think about the responsibility we have as organisers of events. How much can be expected of us to be prepared and supportive for these big reactions…and how much of the responsibility is on the person?

I hope you don’t expect me to have an answer. Because I don’t. I’m really not sure who is responsible for what. I’ve been asked on Instagram if I’ve got counsellors available during the debrief. Which I don’t. And that’s an unrealistic expectation.

I really really really want to encourage people to come along to these super important films even if they are going to feel uncomfortable and become upset. To me that’s not a reason to stay away. And it’s also why I’m providing the debrief after, so at least there is something there to buffer the experience. But I also know that there are people who really CAN’T come. They are at capacity with their grief or mental health, and stepping into a film that will show the reality of living in Gaza during a genocide is too much for what they know they can cope with.

Why am I sharing all this here? (And yes, I’m rambling.)

Maybe it’s to give you some insight into what’s happening for me internally this week and what I’m wrestling with leading up to Friday.

I really hope that I can provide a soft space with the debrief, and that those who come along will show kindness to those that they sit with and maybe, just maybe, come away feeling more connected and less alone in their grief.

(Oh, and I’ve been invited to speak on radio this Wednesday. I don’t have the exact time but it’s the 3CR breakfast program starting at 7:30am. I’d love for you to listen in)